How to Stop Comparing Your Life to Others (Step-by-Step Guide)

They look so happy. I bet they never fight. Why can’t my relationship be like that... We’ve all been there, thumbs scrolling social media looking at the enchanted lives of our former co-workers, schoolmates, old flames, and total strangers, wishing we could switch places with them for just a moment. We spend time examining their images and captions as we flog ourselves mentally for all the choices made that brought us to the present moment, somehow thinking it's “our fault” that their lives look so great and ours feels so crappy. Psychologists have coined this the comparison trap, and there is no doubt that the invention of social media has made the trap much bigger and harder to get out of.((Psychology Today: The Comparison Trap)) Depending on how many people you are connected with on social media and their frequency of posts, you face a daily onslaught of smiling faces and orchestrated moments designed to show how grateful, happy, positive, focused, and productive they have been. Yet, those are mostly curated moments chosen because they don’t capture the real messiness of that person's everyday life. Put simply. those moments may be real, but they are not indicative of what is really happening in that person’s life at the moment. The feeling of being overwhelmed that accompanies actively comparing your life to others can be extremely destabilizing, especially if you are making an upwards comparison. This can be detrimental to you emotionally, physically, and psychologically. Some studies showed that:((American Psychological Association: Taking A Closer Look at Social Comparison Theory))

“When a person chooses an upward (rather than downward) comparison target, . . . that threat leads to increased upward comparisons.”

Comparing yourself against someone whom you believe has a better life and has accomplished more than you only leads to you finding more people with lives that seem better than yours for you to compare yourself to. If you stop comparing your life to others, you will become more content with your life. But how do we stop comparing ourselves to others when we are constantly bombarded by social media images of smiling faces many seemingly unaffected by the world's problems, people boldly fight against injustice looking rested and unscathed, and others who appear to have easily given themselves to the work of spiritual and personal growth without a single set back? Here are the four steps that you should do if you want to stop comparing your life to others.

1. Change Your Focus From External to Internal

Turning your gaze from external to internal is not easy, but it is worth it. You should stop comparing your life to others because you are the only person who needs to validate yourself. I know that may sound like a crazy idea, but it is true. However, that would be a difficult idea to integrate into your life if you have never tried it or are so afraid of it that you cower at the thought of being in a relationship with yourself. A good place to start is by sitting with yourself, whether through meditation, journaling, movement, or some other kind of intentional reflection. Begin by asking yourself, “what are the external influences that I have allowed to guide my life—intentional or accidentally?” Think or write about it. Then, give yourself some time to envision what it would be like to be unmoved by external forces, opinions, or thoughts—draw or write what that reality would be like for you. While this work is ongoing, this is a great starting point that you can always come back to when you feel yourself getting sucked in by those external influences.

2. Limit Your Consumption

It's easy to get caught in the comparison trap when you are constantly looking outside of yourself for validation. Limit your screen time if you want to stop comparing your life to others. Use the tracker on your phone to minimize the amount of time you spend online consuming social media. The images you see there are often highly-curated and seemingly perfect moments in otherwise messy and real lives. Trust me, these people aren’t living examples of perfection they are just crafty people who stockpiled content for drip release over time.

3. Pick One Source of Grounding Inspiration

It's okay to have one or two people whom you look up to for inspiration. This could provide a bit of external guidance for your journey. The person does not have to be a famous one like Deepak Chopra or Oprah. They could be your yoga teacher, mentor, good friend, someone in your industry, or someone on a similar journey. It can be helpful to turn to them as a resource when you feel off your game or if you are losing track of your journey and are starting to get sucked back into the mind-numbing rat race.

4. Cultivate a Sense of Joy to Detach Yourself From Others' Success

Seeing others succeed should not shake your world. Even if you think that they are doing the same thing as you, their success and struggles are their own. Stop comparing your life to others because you are all experiencing different things. Cultivating detachment around the journey of others will help to liberate you from feeling that you have to measure your progress against theirs. Cultivating a sense of authentic joy for their progress will help you celebrate your own progress. When you are happy for others, it makes it easier for you to be happy for yourself. When you are willing to acknowledge the wins of others no matter how small, it allows you to acknowledge your incremental wins, too

Final Thoughts

Proactive self-validation and reflection are the cures for avoiding the comparison trap. However, this is easier said than done. There will be ups and downs in your journey if you want to stop comparing yourself to others. But if you make your focus internal, limit your consumption of ultra-curated social media, pick a grounding source of inspiration, and work on cultivating joy and detachment for the success of others, then you already made a big step in the right direction.

More on How to Stop Comparing to Others

from Lifehack - Feed https://ift.tt/3jgt9Vf
via IFTTT

Comentarios

imagenes del medio ambiente para dibujar

5 Benefits of Drip Irrigation Systems

If you want a stunning yard and a low water bill, a drip irrigation system could be for you. Image: Jacky Parker Photography/Getty Images If you live in one of the parts of the country that’s been struggling with drought (or you just don’t want to spend a fortune on your water bill), you’ve probably felt that you face a choice with your outdoor areas. You can either be water conscious or have a beautiful, lush yard, right? When you’ve opted for traditional irrigation systems like sprinkler heads, that’s often true. But, good news, that’s not your only option as far as types of irrigation systems go. If you want a beautiful yard without the high water usage — and resulting bill! — a drip irrigation system could be just what you need. What is a drip irrigation system? This way to water your plants uses dripped water. A drip irrigation system runs either a perforated hose or drip emitters (connected by a hose) under the soil throughout your planting bed. Water drips through small h

New riverside development in China will be an urban renewal

Architects VenhoevenCS have won a major riverside redevelopment in Shenzhen, China . They hope to protect large areas of land from flooding while also creating a vibrant new urban identity for the Bao’an district. The Pailao River Blueway Project constitutes a new biodiverse landscape along the central Pailoa River, an area under rapid urban development where rainfall intensity is increasing. Architects are using this project to design with the water instead of against it. It includes elements such as ponds, green roofs, urban farming plots, wetlands and soft banks, contributing to a natural sponge effect to absorb excess water from the river . Related: 100-year-old railway yard turned into a green space VenhoevenCS also has their sights set on integrating urban regeneration in the area. They have planned cultural and social spaces, including pavilions and parks for cyclists and pedestrians. The design illustrates their nature-inclusive approach, reshaping how humans and the natu

Say hello to the new Toyota electric vehicle, the bZ4X

Toyota is trying to win the electric vehicle game with a stylish new SUV loaded with techy features. The all-electric bZ4X will be rolling onto the lots of U.S. auto dealers this spring. If the name doesn’t immediately strike you as catchy, it might help to understand that “bZ” stands for “beyond zero.” The bZ4X is the first of seven in Toyota’s new line of bZ vehicles. That’s seven out of 15 BEVs, to throw another acronym at you. BEVs are battery electric vehicles, as opposed to HEVs (hybrid electric vehicles) or PHEVs (plug-in hybrid electric vehicles). Related: Consider these factors before buying an electric vehicle All these Vs will help speed Toyota toward its goal of carbon neutrality by 2050. Already, Toyota has more than 20 million models on the world’s roads. The company has pledged to invest another $70+ billion in EVs over the next nine years. So, back to the bZ4X. According to Toyota, the new “BEV-dedicated platform, a first for Toyota, was developed with Subaru

NASA to test the world's first electric airplane

NASA has shared details of its new all-electric plane that is set to take off to the sky this fall. The plane is designed to run fully on electric batteries , departing from the tradition of fuel-powered planes. If all goes well, this will be the first step toward achieving a cleaner, cheaper, and quieter future for aviation. Known as the X-57, the plane is lightweight compared to traditional planes . Its weight helps it use less power over the same distance compared to its equal fuel-powered planes. Further, the plane produces less noise as compared to fuel-powered options. According to NASA, the plane is currently being prepared for initial tests, which will be conducted in the desert east of Los Angeles. Related: Rolls-Royce unveils prototype for world’s fastest electric plane The plane borrows its design from a four-seater plane constructed by the Italian Tecnam corporation. The main reason for this is to help in comparison of the two models of the design. The experts at NASA w

Biomimicry house hints at a solution to the climate crisis

Houses separate us from nature. At least, that’s the idea we’ve had until now. Architecture that uses biomimicry , permaculture and related practices to keep nature in our building spaces offers a green alternative. B+H Architects Director of Biomimicry Jamie Miller is an advocate of sustainable building practices like biomimicry to help with the climate crisis. Biomimicry creates an architectural option that keeps us connected to nature, without removing the biodiversity from the spaces where we live and work. Now the B+H Architects’ newest residential project shows us how a home can blend right into nature itself. Related: It looks like a shark fin and helps urban river flooding A house that disappears into the landscape “Imagine stepping inside a house that disappears into a forest all without ever leaving the city,” B+H said. A landowner in Bengaluru, India wanted to achieve just that, connecting his home to nature within a dense urban area. He didn’t just want to live wit

What are stellar earthquakes that make stars move?

What are stellar earthquakes that make stars move? The Gaia mission of the European Space Agency revealed the earthquakes that occur thousands of light years away. Argentine astronomers explain the scope of this space telescope and its discoveries. In 2013 the European Space Agency (ESA), launched a unique space mission: the Gaia space observatory, a spacecraft designed specifically for astrometry: the science that measures the positions, distances and motions of stars with a precision never seen before. Scientists say the mission aims to build the largest and most accurate 3D space catalog ever made of the observable universe, with a total of approximately two billion astronomical objects, mainly stars, but also planets, comets, asteroids and quasars, among other fascinating objects in the vastness of space. This week, ESA released a new update of data collected by Gaia in the last three years, after having observed 10 million stars and space objects, which led to the publication of s

Bananatex launches a sustainable material revolution at Milan Design Week

A party of three has collaborated to create a multi-purpose material sourced entirely from banana leaves. Swiss bag brand QWSTION, a yarn specialist from Taiwan, and a Taiwanese weaving partner spent four years developing the new material, which is being revealed at the 2019 Milan Design Week. The strong, flexible material, called Banantex, offers a new universal option in the search for sustainable materials . Beginning at the source, the banana leaves come from a natural ecosystem of sustainable forestry in the Philippines. The banana trees grow naturally without the use of pesticides or other chemicals. Plus, they do not require any additional water. The banana plants are a boon to an area previously eroded by palm plantations, bringing back vegetation and a livelihood for local farmers. Related: See how banana trees are recycled into vegan “leather” wallets in Micronesia With a long history of creating materials from sustainable resources, QWSTION saw the strength and dura

New biofabricated clothing made from algae goes through photosynthesis just like plants

There are a products that completely revolutionize the fashion industry for their eco-friendly approach and innovative vision. Although the fashion industry has made strides over the past few years in terms of sustainable clothing production, there is still a long ways to go. Thankfully, a handful of designers are coming up with incredibly innovative solutions to really change the concept of eco-fashion . One such visionary is Canadian-Iranian designer Roya Aghighi , whose new line of clothing, Biogarmentry, is made from algae that turns carbon dioxide into oxygen via photosynthesis. Made in collaboration with University of British Colombia (UBC) and Emily Carr Univeristy, the Biogarmentry line is a revolutionary design within the world of eco-fashion . While most sustainable designers are searching for fabrics that don’t harm the environment, Aghighi went straight to the environment for her unique fabric, using living, photosynthetic cells in its design. Related: SAOLA offers su

Diet for Depression: 8 Foods To Eat And Avoid

According to the World Health Organization, more than 264 million people suffer from depression globally. [1] Symptoms of depression can include sadness, lethargy and a general loss of interest in life. There are a number of ways to combat this and a diet for depression can help not only your mental health but your well-being as well. In fact, a 2017 study found that the symptoms of people with moderate-to-severe depression improved when they received nutritional counseling sessions and ate a more healthful diet for 12 weeks. [2] Just imagine having higher levels of optimism, energy, positivity, focus, and a greater interest in life. Well, you can. Making some adjustments to your diet can help with your depression. Not only are there foods that you could eat to help with your depression but there are foods that you should avoid. Foods That Help With Depression 1. Oily Fish Oily fish such as salmon, sardines, herring, light tuna and mackerel are a healthy source of Vitamin D. [3]

Eco Vlog News

Welcome to my Vlog about the environment and general news related to it. The advancement of technology and the expansion of the human being are inevitable and an essential mark left by progress as a race, but it is important in the process not to lose respect for the environment and the world in which we live. Become aware of its deterioration as an initial measure to begin to become aware of how to take care of it. For these reasons, our little grain of sand as a contribution to an ecological blog in which we offer you the latest Internet news as a reference so that you can inform yourself and become aware of it. In the articles you can find the respective news sources and most current magazines on which the subject in question is being addressed.

Eco-Vlog

Buscar este blog